Love.

I have had a difficult time finding the time, the energy and the resources to be able to pull together a blog as of recently. Mentally I'm thoroughly exhausted and by extension I'm attempting to consistently be strong, patient and supportive for my wife and for Judah (who is looking to arrive either today or tomorrow!)

This post is difficult to nail down to a particular theme and will probably just act as an entry to communicate my current thoughts, feelings, etc.

So here we go...

Getting all the last little prep stuff done for Judah. Off of work for 2-3 weeks (as of yesterday) Finished up my last class for the semester this past Thursday with a 100% on my research paper, a 96% on my final exam and an A in the class. This is surprising considering the fact that my head has been overwhelmed with "life" right now. I'm moving into my last 3 semesters of school before I get my bachelors. I've already started to explore the option of going into a masters program. I would love to either attend Western Seminary (out of California/Portland) or Fuller in California but I'm neither rich or willing to move. lol

I may have a break before I go after my masters...hopefully building up a strong ministry at Soul Quest and of course more importantly tending to being a good husband and father!

I'm weary of writing too long because Tina is having some strong contractions and they are becoming more regular. I need to go and get some stuff ready for the hospital. I'll leave with these last few things...

I obviously wanted to write longer but I'm not able to right now.

I've never felt this way before, to know that my life will be continued through the life of my son is an incredibly powerful thing. This whole experience (the past 2 years of "stuff") has shaped me into a better person, I have been more apt to seek out the face of God not just through the world of the academy but with how I've sought to live out my life. I'm really without words at this moment concerning my life, I will simply say this:

2 Corinthians 5:7
We walk by Faith, not by Sight

Life itself has been a learning curve, and I'm usually not at a loss for words but the past few weeks have left me without much to say. My head has been taken up with multiple readings from various books for 3 classes. Papers, exams and scripture has been manipulating every brain cell I have or at least what I thought I had. Then (and actually most importantly) comes the fact that my son will be here any minute, any day and I will be forever changed. How blessed I am to know that I will have a son any day now and that he will look to me and call me "Dad." I will be (well Tina and I will be) will be charged with leading our little guy into knowing who God is, in knowing what love is and in growing up healthy, whole and as a boy who prays as if his prayers can and will change the world.

Surely I could write here about my thoughts concerning youth group... I could write about my thoughts concerning holiday consumerism, I could articulate my thoughts concerning the book I'm putting together or the online church community I want to begin...but none of these things matter to me as prominently as bringing my son into this world at any minute.

God has been so incredibly great to Tina and I and I would ask anyone who reads this or passes through please pray for Tina and I and Judah. We greatly appreciate the love, the support and the prayers.

- Lance